Jourdan Lane

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From Chapter 1 of Soul Mates: Deceptions...

"What is the penalty, Adrian? Repeat it back to me so that I know you understand."

"M-master, I—" Adrian's voice was cut off by Lucien's tightening grip around his throat.

"I'm waiting."

Lucien's voice was so full of anger, something I'd heard more and more of in recent months. No matter how much Adrian didn't like me, or me him, I couldn't stand by and watch him be brutally punished for a simple shove. "Damn it, Lucien! Let him go."

Lucien growled in my direction. "Stay out of this, Peter."

"I will not stay out of it!" I stepped toward them both and stood behind Adrian, who was on his knees. I rested my hands on Adrian's shoulders, attempting to reassure him that things would be okay. "It's as much my fault as it is his. He shoved me by accident and I took it the wrong way and shoved back. It was no big deal."

"So now you will lie to me to protect him?" Lucien's lips pursed tight. "Since when is lying your forte, Peter?"

"Since when are you an angry, out of control Master who leads his coven by his cock? What are you trying to do, Lucien? Prove the rumors to be true?"

"How dare you speak to me like this in company," Lucien snarled.

I swatted Lucien's hand away from Adrian's throat and pulled Adrian back. "You may go, Adrian, but do not leave here without word from me. Understand?"

Adrian looked from me to Lucien, his eyes wide in fear as he got to his feet. I gave him a look of warning and he nodded once, before retreating. "Y-yes, Master."

Lucien glared at me as the door slammed shut behind Adrian, shaking his head. "I cannot believe that you just did that."

"From what I understand, this is just as much my coven as it is yours. I will not stand by and let you do this over and over again in some misguided attempt to shelter me from the world in which I belong."

"A world that I should have kept you out of."

Oh, Christ. Not again. This argument was exhaustive, at best, and if we started it in motion, we'd do nothing but argue in circles for the rest of the night. "You have to stop being the protector who runs after each and every bully that pushes me around on the playground."

"This playground could get you killed."

"Oh, it could—but it won't. Not by our own people."

"Right. Our people." He sighed and strode to the desk, pouring himself a Scotch. "Half our people hate you. They cannot stand the sight of you, much less the fact that you are to be treated as Master. They would rather kill you and face the consequences than submit to you."

"You truly believe that, don't you?"

"Humans were never meant to take the throne." He downed his Scotch and poured another.

I stalked over and knocked the Scotch from his hand, sending the glass flying across the room to crash against the wall. "And whose fault is it that I am what I am? If you had kept your promise months ago, tensions might have eased and they would have realized that I'm a permanent fixture around here. But no… you keep me here, you keep me human—day after day, month after month. I'm starting to wonder if it's not about having a steady fuck and feed rather than a companion."

"So now you question my love for you?" Lucien growled, yanking me closer by my shirt collar.

"I question everything," I said, teeth clenched in anger. "The thing I question most, is that if you truly love me—as you say you do—you would not keep me in limbo. You would do as I asked, begged, and you would turn me."

Lucien let me go so suddenly that I stumbled. He made no attempt to help, just walked right past me to stand at the long window looking out over the club. "And as always, no matter what the argument started out as, it leads back to this."

"You don't understand…" I stared at his back, shaking my head.

He held up a hand to silence me, but didn't look back. "You cannot keep undermining me, Peter."

"I won't let you punish someone on a whim."

"I am Master here; I will decide what warrants punishment." Lucien shook his head. "I cannot have you questioning my authority, or they will do it as well. The Council has already made inquiries as to my abilities to maintain the coven in recent months. Every single time you interfere, things only get worse."

"Right," I said softly. "The Master who leads his coven by his cock. The overprotective Master who will punish his own vampires for an angry, or even lustful glance in his companion's direction. The Master who promises one thing, but never really means it."

"Peter—"

"No, that's okay. I'm going." I walked toward the door, but paused as I grasped the knob. "You know? I wish I knew what it was that made you change your mind—made you stop loving me enough to make me your equal. But remember this, Lucien: I'm not human anymore. Whatever I am? You did this to me."

I walked out the door of the office and started down the stairs. I heard a loud roar followed by a crash when I hit midpoint. I paused for a moment, but the sight of Adrian at the bottom made me keep walking. As I reached him, he ducked his head.

"Might I have a word with you?"

I nodded and pointed to the bar a few feet away from us. "I need a drink right now, Adrian. You're more than welcome to join me."

Jack pushed a glass of Scotch in my direction as soon as I slid onto a stool. "Hey, baby. Everything okay?"

"Not really." I smiled tightly and nodded toward Adrian, who'd taken the stool beside mine. "Get him something while we talk?" Jack nodded and left us alone for a moment. "Start talking, Adrian."

"I-I just wanted to say thank you."

"Hm. You're welcome."

"And that… that I'm sorry."

I raised a brow. "Yeah?"

He nodded. "Look, things have been different since you and Lucien bonded. He's changed. And I think a lot of us blame you for it, mistakenly."

"It's not a mistake." I shrugged. "It's all because of me."

"I think we all thought that if we pushed you hard enough, you'd go away." Adrian paused as Jack set his glass of blood before him, waiting until Jack retreated again to continue. "But it's becoming quite clear that you care for the coven, for us, as much as Lucien did."

"Does."

"Hrm." Adrian sighed and picked up his glass. He drank down the liquid and licked at his lips. "Maybe. Really, I just wanted to say thank you for tonight."

"You've said that already."

Adrian stood, but didn't leave. I turned to look at him and he dropped to one knee. "I will never disrespect you again, sir."

"Or Lucien."

He nodded quickly and I reached out, touching his shoulder. "Maybe if you spread the word to play nice?"

"Yes, sir," he said. "I'll do what I can."

"Have a good evening, Adrian."

I turned back to face the bar—and Jack. He reached out and took my hand, squeezing it tightly. "Wanna talk?"

I nodded and he pointed to the door at the end of the bar. I stood and made my way through the growing crowd. As I reached the door, it opened, Jack pulling me inside. It was quieter in the stockroom office, the beat and grind of the music not quite as jarring. I took one look at Jack's sympathetic face and broke into tears.

His arms slid around my back, moving up and down along my spine. "What's the matter, baby?"

So many things. "Oh, Jack… Do you remember when I first met Lucien?"

"How could I forget?"

I clung to him, curling my fingers into his shirt. "Do you remember what you said about how I'd never be first?"

"Peter, I didn't—"

"Sometimes I wish so much that he'd put the coven before me. That he'd be the Lucien I met and fell in love with again." I shook my head, sighing. "I hate this, Jack. I hate the way he treats his people because of me."

"He loves his people—he loves you." He held me at arm's length, eyes meeting mine. "This is a hard time for you both, getting settled, getting comfortable in your relationship, and dealing with the coven and the Council. It's just going to take time, honey."

"It's been over a year, Jack." I pulled away, moving to sit on a nearby couch. "We hardly even talk anymore because…"

"Because?"

"It always leads back to him not bringing me over. I don't know how much longer I can take it. The cravings are only getting worse and he refuses to broach the subject. I don't know what to do anymore."

"And he knows about the cravings?"

"Oh, yeah, he knows. He's been there."

Jack crouched on the balls of his feet before me. "There's got to be a reason that he hasn't done it yet, Peter. He wouldn't bring you this far and not go all the way."

Regardless of how he'd warned me off him before, Jack loved Lucien. Believed in him. Stood up for him. And mostly took his side when I had doubts or issues. There were times when I hoped he might have some sort of insight into Lucien's actions, but he only pushed me to talk to Lucien. If only it were that easy.

"That's what I always thought," I said.

"I know it, Peter. I see the way he looks at you. There's nothing but love for you in his eyes."

"Mixed with a little contempt and jealousy?"

Jack frowned and stood. "I've got to get back to work."

"Sure." I nodded and stood. "Thanks for the talk, Jack. It's done wonders."

He leaned in and kissed me on the lips. "Don't be that way, baby. Come on, I'll get you another drink."

I rolled my eyes and followed him to the door. In just a few minutes, I was sitting at the same stool I'd been on before, a fresh tumbler of Scotch sitting in front of me. I cradled the tumbler in my hands and stared at the amber liquid for a long while, just letting the beat of the music wash through me.

After a while, heat pressed against my back and an arm snaked around my waist. I shuddered at the touch, my head falling to the side instinctively, neck bared in offering. Lucien kissed along the line of my neck, pausing at my ear.

"I'm sorry, lover."

As tempting as it was to ask him what for, I didn't. I relished the touch, the heat, and the scrape of his fangs along my skin. "Don't stop."

One hand slid beneath my shirt, fingers playing over the rings in my nipples. "Here or upstairs?"

"Upstairs…"

We'd fucked in a packed club before. A few times. At the bar, on a couch, on the dance floor—and every time I'd ended up with more hands on me than I could count. It was nice, but tonight I didn't want anyone but Lucien.

I stood, whimpering as his arms wrapped around me and hands moved low across my belly. I rolled my hips and leaned back into him. "Oh, fuck…"

"Close your eyes," he whispered.

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